


The Exchange of Small, Aesthetically Appealing Facsimiles of Animals in Human Mating Practices

by JackQuaker



Series: Old LiveJournal Fics [2]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: I'm just housekeeping, M/M, Vulcan courting, Wooing, kind of, old fic, repost from livejournal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 13:31:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4789061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackQuaker/pseuds/JackQuaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"It is a most illogical practice.  I was given to understand, however, that the exchange of small, aesthetically appealing facsimiles of animal represented the giver's desire for courtship with the receiver in human mating practices."</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Exchange of Small, Aesthetically Appealing Facsimiles of Animals in Human Mating Practices

**Author's Note:**

> I'm just doing some house keeping and moving all my fics to one place. First posted to my [livejournal](http://jack-quaker.livejournal.com/3217.html) back in 2010.
> 
> Unbeta'd.

S/Mc  
TITLE: The exchange of small, aesthetically appealing facsimiles of animals in human mating practices  
PAIRING: Spock/McCoy  
SERIES: ST:XI  
LENGTH: 1,094  
RATING: PG-13? Pretty clean 'cept for a few cuss words and implied sex between 2 men  
SUMMARY: "It is a most illogical practice. I was given to understand, however, that the exchange of small, aesthetically appealing facsimiles of animals represented the giver's desire for courtship with the receiver in human mating practices."  
DISCLAIMER: If you recognize it, I don't own it.  
A/N: I call this a story but really its just a long drabble. Pretty much a silly little thing with no plot. Hope you enjoy!

It was a year into the mission that Spock started acting strange. Well, strange for Spock anyway, which wasn’t all that much when you served along side Jim… and Scotty… and Scotty’s… thing, Keenser. But when one was a rigid Vulcan any deviance was noticeable. He began to visit sickbay, a place he had before avoided like the plague. Of course he always had a reason for his visits. Spock always had reasons for everything he did. Logical ones too. Most of these particular reasons involved ship business that could have easily been handled through messages or via yeomen. They certainly didn’t warrant the attentions of the First Officer.

McCoy figured the real reason was his young, pretty head nurse, Chapel, who’d been making the eyes at Spock almost since the start of the mission. About time Spock noticed her, McCoy figured. It had been 9 months since he and Uhura had broken up, 5 since she and Scotty had started seeing each other, and the Vulcan had been, well, moping for lack of a better word. It was good to know he was finally moving on. As such McCoy manfully refrained from teasing Spock about his visits. Mostly. As much as he was able, which maybe, wasn’t exactly so much.

“Back again Mr. Spock?”

“I should think that would be self-evident, Doctor. I have come to confirm sickbay supply orders.”

“And you had to come down and do that in person?”

“…”

“Careful Spock. You keep showing up like this I’m gonna start thinking you just want to see my pretty face.”

Apparently Spock didn’t think that was worth comment. He shoved the PADD at McCoy, stepped back, and turned his gaze away. McCoy followed his eyes to see Chapel reorganizing his equipment. Again. That woman was a menace. He turned back to Spock, watching him watch Chapel. Spock was tall and lean, his body radiating tightly controlled strength with handsome features that were currently graced with a light green blush. It was adorable. Chapel was a very lucky lady. Suppressing a sigh McCoy signed off on the PADD.

“Here you go. Orders confirmed. Now stop cluttering up my sickbay.”

Spock took the PADD back with a nod and a “Doctor” and then he was gone. McCoy made a bet with himself on how soon the Vulcan would return.

˚(‘,_,’)˚

Six months later Leonard McCoy walked into his office at the start of alpha shift to find a stuffed teddy bear waiting for him on his desk. A teddy bear with fangs. McCoy stood there, staring at it suspiciously for a good 10 minutes before getting his tricorder. No hidden diseases or bombs. Deciding it was safe McCoy picked it up for a closer look. It appeared to be a normal stuffed animal. McCoy himself had had a similar teddy bear as a boy. Minus the fangs, of course. He prodded one of the white points and it easily gave way to the pressure of his finger. It was kind of cute, McCoy thought. Probably some joke from Jim that only Jim got. With a shrug he placed it back on the desk, to the side where it’d be out of the way, and got to work.

It wasn’t until Jim showed up at the end of the day that McCoy thought about the bear again. He was finishing up a report when Jim walked in and flopped down with all the drama of a teenage diva. McCoy ignored him.

“What is that?”

The doctor looked up to see what Jim was pointing at. “A teddy bear.” Apparently it wasn’t from Jim then.

“With fangs?”

“A vampire bear. I call him Teddicula.”

Jim looked at him like he’d gone crazy. “Whatever.”

˚(‘,_,’)˚

It took McCoy a minute to regain his breath when Spock finally pulled back, and another minute to regain the scattered remnants of his brain. That kiss had been mind blowing. No really. When McCoy had used the phrase “mind blowing” before he had never meant it so much or so literally as now.

“What brought that on?” He asked with a lazy smile. “Not that I’m complaining mind you…” Because there was no reason to complain in McCoy’s mind. Unless there were no more of those kisses. Then there would be some complaining going on.

“I came to the conclusion that my plan of abeyance, waiting for you to perceive my affections, was faulty.”

“What?”

Spock pulled away. McCoy bit back a protest but Spock only walked over to McCoy’s desk and picked up Teddicula. Realization dawned.

“You gave me that!”

“Who else but a Vulcan would give you a replica sehlat? And as I am the only Vulcan on this vessel it is only logical that the giver would be me.”

“A sehlat?”

“An animal that was native to Vulcan. I had one as a child whom I spent much time with. It resembles a human bear with six-inch fangs. The replica is not to size of course but is a 1/6 model.”

“Six-inch fangs.” McCoy repeated incredulously. “And here I just thought it was a little bear-pyre.”

“I am unfamiliar with such an entity as a ‘bear-pyre’.” McCoy was almost positive he could hear the quotes in Spock’s voice.

“That’s most likely because I made it up. A cross between a bear and a vampire.” He reached out one finger to prod a fang. That got him the patented Spock eyebrow. “So. Is giving small sehlat replicas some sort of Vulcan courting custom?”

“Negative, Doctor. It is a most illogical practice. I was given to understand, however, that the exchange of small, aesthetically appealing facsimiles of animals represented the giver’s desire for courtship with the receiver in human mating practices. Was I misconstrued?”

McCoy, still admittedly affected by the kiss, had no idea what it was exactly that Spock had just asked. Deciding there were better things to do than try and figure it out he ignored the question and kissed the Vulcan bastard instead. There was a moment where Spock didn’t respond either from shock or confusion but he quickly warmed up to McCoy’s way of thinking. 

One moment he was kissing a Vulcan statue the next McCoy found himself pressed up against his office wall by a ridiculously strong, too-warm body. Spock’s tongue was fucking his mouth in a way that was illegal in three quadrants and probably should be in another seven. This was the last thought McCoy had before he heard the sound of pants being unbuttoned and all higher brain functions ceased for a while.


End file.
